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Who Are You Listening To? Who are you listening to? Why are you listening to that person? We are creatures of habit and environment. Our habits are picked up by the repeated actions, tendencies and behaviors that became normal to us. In our environment we do what we see and we are expanded or limited by the expanse of our environment. However, time and knowledge has shown us that it doesn’t have to be that way. We don’t have to stay in the prison of our past or our experiences. We can expand to new growth but it requires intentional behavior. Intentional behavior includes being mindful of who we are seeking wisdom from. A common mistake that we make in seeking wisdom is that we primarily listen to and get advice from people who we are comfortable with. However, we never stop and ask ourselves why are we comfortable with them in the first place. The truth is that we are comfortable with certain people because we have been in the same environment with them for a long time or we share a similar opinion about certain subjects. For example, those friends that you grew up with in the neighborhood you still look to them for advice and approval because you always did. That girlfriend that you meet for happy hour, she thinks you have the best relationship with the best guy, even though he physically and mentally abuses you. She supports your messy relationships so she is your confidant of wisdom. There is a better way. The better way is to be intentional about your pursuit of wisdom. The Wisdom Equation Wisdom is experience + knowledge + good judgement. A person with experience, who has gone through, survived and thrived in the area you seek needs knowledge and good judgement. Sometimes people survive and win by luck. Luck is not what you’re looking for. You’re looking for wisdom, so you have to make sure that the person you are listening to actually gained knowledge from the situation they experienced. How will you know if they gained knowledge? Knowledge is facts, information and skills gained through experience or education. In other words, what are the facts they learned? What information or skills did they gain from that situation? Lastly, the wisdom equation requires good judgement. A person can have all the experience and knowledge in the world but do they display good judgement on a regular basis? Life is too short to waste your time. Seek wisdom so that you don’t make unnecessary mistakes. Seek wisdom from the right people. Until next time, 🙏🏾 Please subscribe to my YouTube page where I go deeper into this subject and where I’m building a library of empower workshops.🙏🏾
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Your Lack of Goals Will Create Your Lack
I spend a lot of time in thought trying to figure out how and why so many people take the path to destruction as opposed to the path toward a positive future. It would be unfair if I failed to acknowledge that all of us occasionally, and often, fall down, make mistakes and mess up. That’s different from choosing a path that will only lead to destruction and then purposefully staying on that path. Recently in my courtroom a man stood before me with two separate cases. One case was a probation violation, the other case was something new and more serious. The probation violation was based on the man’s previous charge of disorderly conduct. When he was found guilty of disorderly conduct, I chose not to send him to jail but instead I put him on probation and intended to enroll him in my “Finish First Leadership” program. He never reported to probation so he never got into my program, as a result, a warrant was issued for his arrest. Fast forward three years later, he is standing in my court in hand cuffs and, to follow procedure, I confirmed with my Probation Officer that the man never reported to probation. I didn’t bother to ask him why he didn’t report because on this day he had more pressing issues. His current charge was for murder. The report said that he shot another man in the head with a shot gun. How does a person go from disorderly conduct to three years later being charged with murder? I submit to you that much of it has to do with the path that he decided to take. He wasn’t interested in my leadership program. He didn’t have a goal that would lead him out of the hood and on to success. He allowed the destructive direction of his life to take him down a path that lead to despair and devastation. The same applies to you and I. You may not be on the path to murder but you may be in a situation where the lack of positive goals for your future will lead you into a bad situation. ☯️ Are you going to allow that bad relationship to drain you of your ability to flourish and love or will you set goals and change your direction? ☯️ Are you going to continue to underperform at work to the point where you lose you job or will you set goals to change your direction? ☯️ Are you going to continue to spend time with people who are up to no good and don’t mean you any good or will you set goals and change your direction? The choice of your path is up to you, but the destination of your path is already written. Until next time, 🙏🏾 Please subscribe to my YouTube page where I go deeper into this subject and where I’m building a library of empower workshops.🙏🏾 Re-Claim Your Time
We waste time. Of course there are some people who have mastered the ability to maximize their time, but for the most part we could all do better with managing our time. On the worst level there are those who have allowed others to take, use and abuse their time. This week I want you to consider reclaiming your time. You should do this if for no other reason than the fact that your time is too precious to waste. Re-Claiming your time means: ☯️ Stop taking yourself, and allowing people to take you, into debates and arguments about things that don’t really matter. I use to be a victim of this early in my career as a lawyer. I would wear it as a badge of honor to be able to debate with people on any subject. I was even on the college and law school debate team, but as I have grown Ian’s matured I now realize that my energy is more important than proving that I can argue. The same applies to you. ☯️ Stop spending your most valuable and productive hours on tasks that are not productive or valuable. Social media has a lot of good elements but it can also be a pit of distraction and destruction. Gossiping at work can have a benefit of spreading information but it can also be a source of toxicity. Make it a point to complete productive activities before you scroll social media or gossip with others so that you can re-claim your time and live your absolute best life. ☯️ Value your time and make others value your time. How often does someone totally waste your time, keep you waiting or discount the importance of your presence? What do you normally do when that happens? You likely say, “that’s ok,” but it is not ok. If you refuse to let someone know when your time is not being valued, their behavior will never change. They will continue to disrespect your time. Even more importantly, if you don’t value your own time no one else will. Today take these steps: Stop being late, arrive early. Stop moping around, move with purpose. Stop de-valuing your time because your time is your life. When your time is up, your life is up. Re-claim your time as the most valuable asset that you have. Until next time, 🙏🏾 Please subscribe to my YouTube page where I go deeper into this subject and where I’m building a library of empower workshops.🙏🏾 |
AuthorJust a Judge trying to help people live their greatest lives. Archives
March 2023
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